ABEL AND KANE!!!

So i guess there's a time...a point in your life when you have to tell it..Or let it die forever..I guess???..So i guess im going to tell it...tell it from the start...way back...1965.. still five more years until i was alive!!.. Its good though that's when Mj was born That is when another chapter began...My brother would tell you different but i have the still-frames in my mind forever(por vida)..that's one of few Spanish phrases i picked up on during my journey but we'll get to that later..)The still-frames i have are of a proud kid who had nothing but hope!!MJ used to comb his black hair straight back!! He wanted it to look like his cousin and imaginary half brother lewis's hair!! Lewis was a handsome fellow for the 70's//Actually any time that guy would have been handsome..Mj tried to mimic his style...White t shirt khakis...the whole nine i swear it!!Like ten years later when i was 5 i was in my step cousin Lewis room while he ironed his khakis and polished his Stacy Adams and loaded his 38 special revolver..(My personal favorite memory to date)..Anyways when i was around five my brother MJ was still down..My mother was still in prison and hooked on heroin and Lewis was a GOD for us!!Mostly for MJ..Its funny how the men we idolize as children are the same nightmares our mothers brought home!!My cousin Lewis was lovely but do you remember the 38 revolver??Oh ya my cousin would show up with red roses but first im quite certain he had to check the address to remember a girlfriend or was it a funeral he brought flowers to celebrate?My mothers boyfriend were the same...one after another..Nice when they weren't dope sick but Satan every-other day or so i was told later!!Anyway MJ and Me huh? Yeah we started the SAME.. We went through it all together..At one point we chose different paths and today its no different but it better..It's bliss actually for me..I just hope my brother finds comfort...You see for along time they asked me to write this...He did too>>MJ i mean>>but we all discussed privacy..invasion?? So here i am telling it...Pulling no punches..Telling it Raw..from the beginning...back to innocence..Yessir i was an alter boy at our lady of Guadalupe in around 1981..but there's too much to tell before then..but ya i was an Alter boy too!!I guess ill start with Sammy and see how much i can take...Sammy was a heroin dealer..My moms boyfriend..My so-called step Dad..Not Father But step Dad!!We had many motels downtown by the sunset strip...My brother was already 10 years old and into all kinds of havok!! The streets were raising another angel from the los city..I remember way back then seeing the hesitation..the uncertainty..the looking around to pass the cup..and here i came...i put my hands out and took the weight from my brother..I embraced the cold world and took that shit off of him!!I knew he wasn't ready for it..It wasn't in him..He had to pass it..I remember one day some years later my brother brought home a trumpet when we were in foster care..I knew he was gone and i was doing the tour..It wasn't for him...Maybe it wasn't for me either..But hey i have some regrets...I hate when people say (i Have NO regrets) .. I myself have a few..